From before our babies are born, we begin loving them and building the foundations that encourage health & happiness. They grow and learn quickly, taking in all that is around them, like sponges. We are not in control of how they perceive information, and there are days that they must hear “no” far too many times, (especially toddlers).
But, positive reinforcement of the foundations we believe in, can be easy.
During a calm moment, settling in for a nap, tucking in for the night, or just that cozy relaxed cuddle, tell them those important bits. Remind them what a good kid they are, how much you love them, what a good job they did, how smart they are.
A child’s subconscious is very open, but those moments of quiet are a perfect time to reinforce foundations.
Counseling Hypnotherapist, On Track Hypnotherapy
Our hats are off to Dr. Harvey Karp! On page 59 of a wonderful book called “The Happiest Toddler on the Block,” Dr. Karp shares a table of “Labels that Hurt – Descriptions that Help,” which depicts the very fundamentals of re-framing. How we can build our children’s self-esteem, just by being aware of the language we are using and what words actually inspire.
He points out that when a child appears to be bossy, they may be destined to leadership. He promotes the idea that most words we use which have negative connotations such as “hyper” can be easily replaced with their positive counter parts such as “energetic or passionate”. A very negative “nosy” is quite an endearing “curious”.
His list continues but instead of posting it here, I challenge you to add a comment of your favourite one word re-frames.
See the comment below to get you started!
Some say the secret lies with the "3 Day Rule", put your toddler in underwear and schedule frequent visits to the potty using a timer. Deal with a couple days of wiping up puddles and a few extra loads of laundry. Try not to pull your hair out on the morning of day 3, and by that evening, voalá! Post your diaper pail on the swap 'n' shop and give your wipe warmer to your pregnant sister, no more diapers for you!
Ahhh, what a nice thought. So simple, so elegant. But perhaps you found that this method didn't quite suite your non-conformist little one.
Perhaps after some late-night googling, you decided to try the "No one is angry, accidents happen, but we will clean you up with this chilly wet cloth." or the "Good girl using the potty! Let me reward you with one of these sugary treats that I have to talk myself out of eating late at night when I'm exhausted from a day of dealing with other peoples bodily fluids." methods.
"No, Jimmy, a pull-up is not just 'cool underwear you can pee in'."
The struggle is real.
What worked for you?
Please comment and share with us your potty training tips and tricks and your stories of successes (and your stories of failure - especially the ones that are funny now, but weren't at the time).
Rosy Window Staff